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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29955561">your heart beats so beautifully</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/2space_lesbo1/pseuds/banditoheart'>banditoheart (2space_lesbo1)</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Snowboard One Shots [6]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Hannibal (TV), SK8 the Infinity (Anime)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Cannibalism, Dead Dove: Do Not Eat, Dubious Consent, Emotional Manipulation, Gen, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Implied/Referenced Dubious Consent, M/M, Manipulation, Manipulative Relationship, Mind Manipulation, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Nonnies Made Me Do It, Other, Vivisection, Why Did I Write This?, hm, lol oops, this one uh, this ones messed up</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-10</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-16 01:20:22</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,588</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29955561</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/2space_lesbo1/pseuds/banditoheart</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>reki felt like he was dying, but langa is there to help. he always helps.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Hasegawa Langa/Kyan Reki</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Snowboard One Shots [6]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2190897</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>70</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>your heart beats so beautifully</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>oh my god if anyone actually reads this i will fuckig. die</p><p>mostly posting this here since idk how to make the dumb "read more" thing on tumblr</p><p>but uh</p><p> </p><p>this is basically a fic where langa is hannibal like and reki is will graham like</p><p>so it is messed up. </p><p>please ugh</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>reki pants heavily, his lungs heaving to get fresh air down his throat and into his chest. saliva and spit pours from his mouth, dampening his shirt until it's covered in the stuff. his entire body shakes as he leans over the sink, stomach recoiling uncomfortably as he coughs and heaves. he can faintly hear soft footsteps behind him, familiar footsteps- he knows those footsteps. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>but he can't focus on that. he can only focus on the pain in his stomach and chest and throat and mouth and head. his brain feels like it's being sliced in half, like his limbs are on fire. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>and then there are hands on his shoulder and face, deft, cool fingers lightly cupping his chin. he leans into the touch, craving the coolness of the hand while he feed so hot. a thumb comes up to rub along the curve of his lower lip, clearly not caring about the saliva soaking his skin. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“oh, reki, what have you done?” he knows that voice. he loves that voice. he </span>
  <em>
    <span>needs</span>
  </em>
  <span> that voice. he whines quietly, his throat protesting, and he needs to get closer to the owner of the voice- he is safety and warmth and the only person who understands him in the entire fucked up world. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>another hand begins to card through his hair, and he cries softly, craving the gentle touches in the midst of his pain. the thumb on his lip stays there, keeping his mouth hanging open in the slightest. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“l- langa,” he sobbed, his hands releasing their death grip on the counter to blindly grasp out for the other man. his fingers close around fabric, connected to a warm and solid body and he holds on for dear life. “he-help, please.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>langa hums softly, and crouches in front of reki, basically supporting his weight at this point. reki was tired, and due to this, he was leaning forward, into his psychiatrist, seeking out the comfort his pain addled mind needs. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“of course i'd help you, reki,” langa said, his voice just the right pitch and volume to not be loud or grating against reki’s sensitive ears. it was also close to sounding like a coo. the hand in his hair slides down to caress his cheek, a finger brushing away his tears. “so, just go to sleep.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“wh- what-?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>and the next thing reki knows, he's being yanked against langa’s chest, a piece of cool fabric with a strange smell getting shoved over his mouth and nose. he struggles weakly for a moment, surprised by the sudden change in gravity, and chokes against the fabric. but langa is whispering calming words in his ears and he's suddenly beyond tired and so he shuts his eyes, falling into blessed sleep. </span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>when reki reawakens, he almost wishes he hadn't. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he groggily peels his eyes open, glad to find the pain that had previously been ripping his body apart no longer present. but that revelation is short lived, as pretty quickly, he discovers that his ankles and wrists are bound to the surface he was currently splayed out across. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he pulls at them meekly, finding his movements and thoughts to still be sluggish, and then catches sight of wires and tubes connected to his right wrist. he blinks sluggishly, confused. was he at a hospital? oh, langa must have brought him here after finding him in such a horrendous state. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>which… why had he been in so much pain? it had almost felt like he was dying. he hadn't been showing any signs of sickness just an hour before, and then after his session with langa he was vomiting and hardly able to move. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>the soft footsteps from before reaches his ears, and he turns his head to see langa slowly approaching him. he has a cool smile on his lips, and a pair of latex blue gloves on each of his hands, as well as a gown that most doctors would wear. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>reki finally finds out that he is shirtless, his bare chest and stomach on display to the brightly lit room. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>and where was he? </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>this didn't look like a hospital room. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>it almost looks like langa’s basement… </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“ah, reki, you are back with us,” langa said, drawing him from his thoughts. that smile is still gracing his lips, and reki only stays calm because of that and the gentle warmth his eyes currently held. reki trusts langa with his life. he's sure langa was somehow helping him. he comes to stand beside the bed he's bound to, resting his hands on the side and leaning his weight to look over reki. “now, reki, i need you to listen to me, okay?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>reki wets his lips, his brain still struggling to keep up with everything. but he nods anyway, trusting langa. langa smiles at him again, and pays his cheek lightly with one of his hands. reki beams under his approval. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“you were poisoned earlier as it would happen, reki,” langa said gravely, frowning a little bit and reki frowns in return. poisoned? when was he poisoned? he'd been fine not too long ago, right? but langa is saying he was poisoned so he had to have been poisoned. “because of this, there isn't enough time for me to get you to a hospital. but that's okay, because i remember my medical training, so i can help you instead. so you trust me, yes, reki?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>help him? langa could help him feel better? could help him from being poisoned? oh, wonderful. langa was so amazing and always knew how to help reki. reki trusts him to help him with this, too, just like everything involving his mental health. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>at reki’s second slow nod langa’s smile turns into a grin. he grasps one of reki’s hands and squeezes it lightly. “i am so glad you trust me enough to do this, reki,” langa said, his voice as warm as ever. reki shakily smiles in return, happy to have made langa happy. “i won't lie- this is going to be scary. but i know you're brave, reki.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>reki is grinning now. langa thinks him brave, even after all of the countless hours of reki telling him his darkest fears and secrets. the thought makes his chest feel warm, even as his mind sluggishly swirls. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>langa pulls back for a moment, before returning with a sharp and gleaming scalpel. reki's mouth goes dry and his heart stutters for a moment at the sight, before he remembers its langa holding it, and not anyone else. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>langa hovers back over him, and then, without a word, brings the scalpel to the bottom of reki’s chest. reki watches with wide, curious eyes, not sure what langa was planning with it. that is, until the scalpel is smoothly behind sliced from the bottom of his stomach to the top of his waist. his eyes widen further with fascination as beads of his blood slides down his sides, and he realizes he can't feel any of it. he can't feel the scalpel cutting into his skin and muscle and stomach, nor the blood running down his sides and pooling on the bed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>langa slices another clean line vertically now, from reki’s left side to his right. reki can feel his stomach clench with his slight anxiety over the situation, but once again, he trusted langa. so of course he trusted him with whatever reason he was cutting his stomach open now. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>his skin and outer muscles are peeled back, and langa keeps the flaps held open with medical instruments reki cant think of the names for. he's craning his neck forward and over reki’s stomach now, and the grin has returned tenfold, his beautiful eyes sparkling at whatever he was now staring at. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“oh, reki…” langa murmured, and if he wasn't so close reki would have missed the reverence in his voice. he reaches forward, and into reki’s opened stomach, before pulling </span>
  <em>
    <span>something </span>
  </em>
  <span>red and pink and pulsating that was still connected to reki into the open air. huh. reki couldn't feel it. but he thinks it's his stomach. weird. langa was holding his still moving stomach in his hands like it were something delicate and amazing. his stomach flutters at the thought, which he found amusing since he could currently see his stomach, and it was not, in fact, fluttering. “reki, you are </span>
  <em>
    <span>beautiful</span>
  </em>
  <span> and </span>
  <em>
    <span>wonderful. </span>
  </em>
  <span>just as i thought you'd be.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>reki grins at him goofily, his vision and thoughts staying mushy and hazy. he can't speak, but that's ok, because langa is happy staring inside of him, his eyes glowing and his smile the widest reki has ever seen it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“you are doing so well, reki,” langa muttered, pulling another red and pulsating thing from reki. he doesn't leave it connected this time, however, putting it aside somewhere reki cant see. langa chuckles at his curious gaze. “don't worry, reki. that was just one of your kidneys. i'm leaving the other one there, but i'm keeping this one for myself.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>reki doesn't understand many of his words, or whyd he'd want a kidney in the first place, but he doesn't question it. langa pauses, and pulls his bloody hands out of reki’s stomach. “that is alright with you, yes?” he asked. why wouldn't it be? langa could have it, right? he said he'd be fine without it, after all. langa grins at his nod of consent. “</span>
  <em>
    <span>wonderful</span>
  </em>
  <span>, reki, simply </span>
  <em>
    <span>wonderful</span>
  </em>
  <span>. i am excited to see what i can make.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>he then reaches back inside, and reki can hear him pushing things around, and watches him pull another thing out. he places it where he'd placed the kidney, but this time, he doesn't ask for reki’s permission. not that reki minded. langa could take whatever he wanted.  “i'm sure you won't be missing your spleen, and i was just needing one,” langa said with a smirk, and reki silently agrees with him. langa always knows what's best. “it's amazing how much your body can go without, reki.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>reki doesn't know much time passes before langa is once more gripping the scalpel, looming just above reki. reki blinks, his gaze losing the gaze that had covered it. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“now, reki, i need to get into your chest now,” langa said, and reki blinks at him owlishly. “you don't mind, right, reki?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>of course he doesn't. he shakes his head to let langa know this, and the other man simply grins once more, almost looking like a kid in a candy shop. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>with practiced movements, langa cuts into his chest in a very similar way to how he'd sliced his stomach open. he gasps when he fully opens reki’s chest, bringing his hands to cover his mouth momentarily at whatever he saw. reki hopes it's nothing bad. he doesn't want to ruin langa’s fun. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“reki,” langa breathed, and suddenly he's reaching into reki’s chest, leaning his face as close as he possibly could without getting it in there, too. “reki, you are </span>
  <em>
    <span>beautiful.</span>
  </em>
  <span>” hes shifting around inside of his chest, but he can't even feel it, but he can feel his heart kick up in speed and his cheeks burn at langa’s blatant praising of his body. “your heart, reki, is so large and beautiful and </span>
  <em>
    <span>warm</span>
  </em>
  <span>.” reki lifts his head enough to see inside of his chest, just able to make out that langa had sneaked his hand between his ribs to cradle his heart. this causes his heart to skip a beat, and what a strange sight to </span>
  <em>
    <span>see</span>
  </em>
  <span> it happen. langa was holding his heart, and so delicately at that. his cheeks burn hotter. he was staring at it like it was his most prized possession in a collection of valued treasures. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>langa wets his lips, and gives reki’s heart a gentle squeeze. and, oh, reki can feel that. he gasps as his heart stutters once more, and langa is quickly pulling his hand away and out of his chest. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>langa can't seem to take his eyes off of the inside of reki’s body, however, his gaze filled with absolute reverence. reki’s blush deepens, and he lightly shuts his eyes, suddenly finding it hard to breathe. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>a moment later, and something is being slid over his mouth and nose and he can suddenly breathe again. he peels his eyes open, an oxygen mask over his face, and langa hovering over him once more. he is focused, working on something with reki’s body. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“terribly sorry, reki,” langa said once he noticed reki's eyes are once more open. he's stitching his stomach and chest closed again. but why is he sorry? he hasn't done anything wrong. “i kept you open for far too long. but you will still be alright, and i can make you dinner later.” he smirks, malice suddenly in his eyes. “how does kidney sound to you?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>reki doesn't respond. he can't, anyway. he was suddenly too tired again, his brain muddled and too slow for him to stay awake. </span>
</p><p><br/>
<br/>
</p><p>
  <span>he comes to with the smell of cooked meat, and his stomach rumbles. he peels his eyes open once more, hardly able to recall anything that has happened. he moves, only to find his chest and stomach protesting at him with great pain. he draws in a quick and stuttering breath, eyes watering from the pain. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>but he finds himself in langa’s dining room, left in one of the chairs. there is a plate on the table in front of him, some kind of cooked meat and vegetables on top of it. he raises his gaze to find langa on the other side of the table, already eating the prepared and delicious food, and reki instantly relaxed at the sight of him. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“langa…?” he muttered, mouth and throat dry. he was finding it hard to move or speak or think. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“good morning, reki,” langa said with a smile. he points to a cup of water, that reki takes as quickly as his body was currently allowing him to. he chugs it, his stomach roiling in protest despite its hungry growling. “how are you feeling? you did just come out of surgery.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>reki blinks in confusion, and then remembers how horrible he'd felt before, hardly able to move without great pain. “oh… i did?” he muttered, and langa nods in response. “what for?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“you were poisoned, and so they had to clean you with surgery,” langa replied, and reki cant recall that surgery existing. but, langa was saying this had happened, so he believed him. he probably knows more about the medical fields and practices, anyway. “are you hungry?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>reki nods, and shakily grips the fork beside his plate. he finds the meat already cut, and jabs a piece with his fork. he slowly brings it to his lips, suddenly acutely aware of how focused langa was on him. his eyes are following the movement of reki’s fork with intent interest, and he continues to watch as reki chews the meat and swallows it. there is a glint of </span>
  <em>
    <span>something</span>
  </em>
  <span> in his gaze, something similar to pleasure. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“it's good,” reki said, still reeling from the delicious taste the meat had left in his mouth. langa’s smirk turns into a full blown grin at his words. “what is it?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>langa leans back in his chair, taking a bite of his own meat, eyes locked with reki’s the entire time. he lets out a small breath of laughter, as though sharing an inside joke with himself, crossing his hands together in front of his chest. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“kidney.” </span>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>why did i write this... oh yeah, therapy.</p></blockquote></div></div>
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